Sibling Relationships Reflect Family Dynamics
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Most children in the United States grow up with sisters and brothers. Connections that usually last a lifetime, these relationships can be strained at times, especially during childhood. New research concludes that sibling ties are best understood in the context of their families, and that efforts to improve relationships should take into account not just the siblings, but the family as a whole.
This research also found that, overall, sisters feel closer to their siblings than do brothers, and that relationships between sisters and brothers become closer in later adolescence. Further, for all siblings, discord is highest when the first-born child is about 13 and the second-born is about 10.
As reported in the November/December 2006 issue of the journal Child Development, researchers at Pennsylvania State University interviewed mothers, fathers, and first- and second-born children in 200 white, working- and middle-class, two-parent families. During the course of the study, first-born children ranged from 10 to 19 years of age, with an average age of 12 at the start of the study and 17 at the end. Second-born children ranged from 7 to 17 years of age during the study, with an average age of 9 at the start and 15 at the end.
Among the study's key findings are:
* Changes in parent-child relationships are associated with changes in sibling relationships. Specifically, changes in mothers' warmth and acceptance of their children from middle childhood through later adolescence are associated with changes in siblings' feelings of closeness and intimacy with one another. When there are increases or decreases in conflict between fathers and their children, the children show similar changes in conflict with their siblings.
* Siblings may turn to one another for support when family circumstances are difficult. When fathers say there is less love in their marriages, their children are closer with their siblings.
"This study showed that sibling relationships change across childhood and adolescence, with many siblings reporting that they have relationships in later adolescence that are more positive and have less conflict," according to Ji-Yeon Kim, the study's lead author and research associate at Pennsylvania State University. "Sibling relationships are part of the larger family system of relationships and may both affect and be affected by marital and parent-child relationships."
Photo above from http://stepfamiliestoday.wordpress.com
This research also found that, overall, sisters feel closer to their siblings than do brothers, and that relationships between sisters and brothers become closer in later adolescence. Further, for all siblings, discord is highest when the first-born child is about 13 and the second-born is about 10.
As reported in the November/December 2006 issue of the journal Child Development, researchers at Pennsylvania State University interviewed mothers, fathers, and first- and second-born children in 200 white, working- and middle-class, two-parent families. During the course of the study, first-born children ranged from 10 to 19 years of age, with an average age of 12 at the start of the study and 17 at the end. Second-born children ranged from 7 to 17 years of age during the study, with an average age of 9 at the start and 15 at the end.
Among the study's key findings are:
* Changes in parent-child relationships are associated with changes in sibling relationships. Specifically, changes in mothers' warmth and acceptance of their children from middle childhood through later adolescence are associated with changes in siblings' feelings of closeness and intimacy with one another. When there are increases or decreases in conflict between fathers and their children, the children show similar changes in conflict with their siblings.
* Siblings may turn to one another for support when family circumstances are difficult. When fathers say there is less love in their marriages, their children are closer with their siblings.
"This study showed that sibling relationships change across childhood and adolescence, with many siblings reporting that they have relationships in later adolescence that are more positive and have less conflict," according to Ji-Yeon Kim, the study's lead author and research associate at Pennsylvania State University. "Sibling relationships are part of the larger family system of relationships and may both affect and be affected by marital and parent-child relationships."
Photo above from http://stepfamiliestoday.wordpress.com
Early Sibling Relationships Influence Adult Behavior
![Picture](/uploads/1/4/3/8/14382586/3169323.jpg?0)
A new study suggests the relationship we have with our siblings during youth has a considerable influence on our social and emotional development as adults.
Laurie Kramer, a University of Illinois researcher, says that although a parent’s influence on a child’s development shouldn’t be underestimated, neither should a sibling’s.
“What we learn from our parents may overlap quite a bit with what we learn from our siblings, but there may be some areas in which they differ significantly,” Kramer said.
Parents are better at teaching the social niceties of more formal settings – for example, how to act in public and how not to embarrass oneself at the dinner table.
But siblings are better role models of the more informal behaviors – how to act at school or on the street, or, most important, how to act cool around friends – that constitute the bulk of a child’s everyday experiences.
“Siblings are closer to the social environments that children find themselves in during the majority of their day, which is why it’s important not to overlook the contributions that they make on who we end up being,” Kramer said.
Kramer, who along with Katherine J. Conger, of the University of California at Davis, co-edited a volume on this topic for a recent issue of the journal New Directions for Child and Adolescent Development, says a clearer understanding of how siblings function as “agents of socialization” will help answer critical societal questions such as why some children pursue antisocial behavior.
“We know that having a positive relationship with siblings is related to a whole host of better outcomes for teenagers and adults,” Kramer said.
“A lot of current research looks at how children learn undesirable behaviors like smoking, drinking and other delinquent acts, from exposure to an older sibling’s antisocial behaviors as well as that of their sibling’s friends.
“For example, a female teen is at higher risk for getting pregnant if her older sister was a teenage mother. Developing a better understanding of sibling influences can help us design effective strategies for protecting younger children in families.”
According to Kramer, in order to maximize an older sibling’s positive influence, one of the most important things parents can do is to help foster a supportive relationship between the siblings from the very beginning.
“We know from longitudinal studies that if kids start off their relationship with a sibling on a positive note, it’s more likely to continue positively over time,” she said.
Variables such as gender and age difference don’t make much of a difference between siblings.
“It’s not all that important whether you’re spaced closer together or farther apart, or if you have a brother or a sister,” Kramer said.
“What’s really much more important are the social behaviors that children learn in their early years that they can use to develop a positive relationship with a sibling. That’s why it’s important for parents to encourage siblings to be engaged with one another and develop a relationship where there is mutual respect, cooperation and the ability to manage problems.”
Kramer said children who grow up as an only child are not necessarily less socially competent than children who grow up with siblings, but they are more likely to have developed social skills through friends as opposed to brothers and sisters.
“Growing up just with parents is a different environment for young people,” she said.
“Parents of only children might want to think about how they can help their child have social experiences with other children, whether that’s through childcare, preschool or play dates.”
Do single children establish surrogate siblings with cousins and friends?
“They may be encouraged by parents to develop deeper relationships, and that’s a good thing because it provides them an opportunity to develop some of these social competencies that they probably won’t acquire if they’re limited to interacting with their parents and teachers,” Kramer said.
Parents who have children who are spaced closely together in age may not see much of a need to have children over to the house once a week because their children are already having significant social experiences within the family unit, Kramer said.
But children whose siblings are spaced further apart in age are most likely to have different sets of friends and different social experiences because they may be in distinct school contexts or involved in unique activities. “It’s possible that siblings who are spaced further apart are very connected within the home, but their social experiences outside the family may be pretty different,” Kramer said.
And, Kramer notes, having Wally Cleaver for an older brother doesn’t necessarily mean the younger sibling will turn out like Wally – they may end up like Beaver.
“We know that not all younger children turn out like their older siblings,” Kramer said. “There are many cases where younger siblings work very hard to carve out their own unique path and be different from their brothers and sisters, a process researchers refer to as ‘de-identification.’
“They may choose a different path in which to excel or make their mark to base their own identity on. That child may choose to focus on sports, the arts or being the social one. It relieves them from the pressure to be seen or compared to their elder sibling, particularly if they’re afraid that they won’t be able to measure up.
“So they figure out who they are, what they believe in and what’s important to them, in reaction to how they perceive their siblings.”
Kramer cautions that while we don’t know all of the implications of sibling influence, “we do know that growing up in a family where there is another child makes it a very different environment socially, cognitively and emotionally,” Kramer said.
“Children learn things through growing up with other children in the house, just as they learn things growing up in a more adult-oriented environment if they’re a single child. We need to understand that better so that we can form a more realistic understanding of child and family development.”
Photo above from http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/01/18/early-sibling-relationships-influence-adult-behavior/10803.html
Laurie Kramer, a University of Illinois researcher, says that although a parent’s influence on a child’s development shouldn’t be underestimated, neither should a sibling’s.
“What we learn from our parents may overlap quite a bit with what we learn from our siblings, but there may be some areas in which they differ significantly,” Kramer said.
Parents are better at teaching the social niceties of more formal settings – for example, how to act in public and how not to embarrass oneself at the dinner table.
But siblings are better role models of the more informal behaviors – how to act at school or on the street, or, most important, how to act cool around friends – that constitute the bulk of a child’s everyday experiences.
“Siblings are closer to the social environments that children find themselves in during the majority of their day, which is why it’s important not to overlook the contributions that they make on who we end up being,” Kramer said.
Kramer, who along with Katherine J. Conger, of the University of California at Davis, co-edited a volume on this topic for a recent issue of the journal New Directions for Child and Adolescent Development, says a clearer understanding of how siblings function as “agents of socialization” will help answer critical societal questions such as why some children pursue antisocial behavior.
“We know that having a positive relationship with siblings is related to a whole host of better outcomes for teenagers and adults,” Kramer said.
“A lot of current research looks at how children learn undesirable behaviors like smoking, drinking and other delinquent acts, from exposure to an older sibling’s antisocial behaviors as well as that of their sibling’s friends.
“For example, a female teen is at higher risk for getting pregnant if her older sister was a teenage mother. Developing a better understanding of sibling influences can help us design effective strategies for protecting younger children in families.”
According to Kramer, in order to maximize an older sibling’s positive influence, one of the most important things parents can do is to help foster a supportive relationship between the siblings from the very beginning.
“We know from longitudinal studies that if kids start off their relationship with a sibling on a positive note, it’s more likely to continue positively over time,” she said.
Variables such as gender and age difference don’t make much of a difference between siblings.
“It’s not all that important whether you’re spaced closer together or farther apart, or if you have a brother or a sister,” Kramer said.
“What’s really much more important are the social behaviors that children learn in their early years that they can use to develop a positive relationship with a sibling. That’s why it’s important for parents to encourage siblings to be engaged with one another and develop a relationship where there is mutual respect, cooperation and the ability to manage problems.”
Kramer said children who grow up as an only child are not necessarily less socially competent than children who grow up with siblings, but they are more likely to have developed social skills through friends as opposed to brothers and sisters.
“Growing up just with parents is a different environment for young people,” she said.
“Parents of only children might want to think about how they can help their child have social experiences with other children, whether that’s through childcare, preschool or play dates.”
Do single children establish surrogate siblings with cousins and friends?
“They may be encouraged by parents to develop deeper relationships, and that’s a good thing because it provides them an opportunity to develop some of these social competencies that they probably won’t acquire if they’re limited to interacting with their parents and teachers,” Kramer said.
Parents who have children who are spaced closely together in age may not see much of a need to have children over to the house once a week because their children are already having significant social experiences within the family unit, Kramer said.
But children whose siblings are spaced further apart in age are most likely to have different sets of friends and different social experiences because they may be in distinct school contexts or involved in unique activities. “It’s possible that siblings who are spaced further apart are very connected within the home, but their social experiences outside the family may be pretty different,” Kramer said.
And, Kramer notes, having Wally Cleaver for an older brother doesn’t necessarily mean the younger sibling will turn out like Wally – they may end up like Beaver.
“We know that not all younger children turn out like their older siblings,” Kramer said. “There are many cases where younger siblings work very hard to carve out their own unique path and be different from their brothers and sisters, a process researchers refer to as ‘de-identification.’
“They may choose a different path in which to excel or make their mark to base their own identity on. That child may choose to focus on sports, the arts or being the social one. It relieves them from the pressure to be seen or compared to their elder sibling, particularly if they’re afraid that they won’t be able to measure up.
“So they figure out who they are, what they believe in and what’s important to them, in reaction to how they perceive their siblings.”
Kramer cautions that while we don’t know all of the implications of sibling influence, “we do know that growing up in a family where there is another child makes it a very different environment socially, cognitively and emotionally,” Kramer said.
“Children learn things through growing up with other children in the house, just as they learn things growing up in a more adult-oriented environment if they’re a single child. We need to understand that better so that we can form a more realistic understanding of child and family development.”
Photo above from http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/01/18/early-sibling-relationships-influence-adult-behavior/10803.html
Website Resources
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Sibling relationships
http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/physical_health/child_development/primary_siblings.shtml
BBC Health has some great pointers and tips on how to have your children enjoy each other’s company and get along better. BBC health states, “Sibling relationships are the testing ground where children try out different ways of socializing with others and handling disagreements, shaping how they relate to others as teenagers and adults.” This website includes tips such as praise them as they get along, teach them how to negotiate with others, have empathy for one another, and be a good example. BBC Health also talks about how birth plays a role in sibling relationships. The last topic they talk about in sibling relationships is helping with the age gap. BBC talks about how families should find activities that they can all participate on just at different levels and playing different roles in the activities (BBC - Health: Sibling Relationships). Overall, this website is a great resource for pointers and tips on how to have your children and help your children establish successful sibling relationships.
Handling Sibling Rivalry
http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/parenting/sibling_rivalry.shtml
The Child Development Institute Parenting Today gives some really great advice and information about sibling relationships. This website talks about how sibling relationships are determined by the child’s position in the family, the sex of the child, and the age of the children. It also states that the parent’ s attitude determines how the children behave to one another. It is mentioned on this website that it is not possible to treat the children as equals all the time. The parenting advice they give is: don’t compare your children to one another, don’t dismiss your child’s resentment or angry feelings, avoid situations that promote guilt in siblings, and they say try to let children settle their own conflicts with one another. The Child Development Institute Parenting Today has a special section on siblings with handicaps and it heeds parents to spend quality time with the children who are not special needs so they feel just as important as the child who might require more time and care. This website leaves you with the advice to not take sides and do not ignore the good behaviors the children have one to another (Handling Sibling Rivalry « Child Development Institute Parenting Today).
Photo above from http://stepfamiliestoday.wordpress.com
http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/physical_health/child_development/primary_siblings.shtml
BBC Health has some great pointers and tips on how to have your children enjoy each other’s company and get along better. BBC health states, “Sibling relationships are the testing ground where children try out different ways of socializing with others and handling disagreements, shaping how they relate to others as teenagers and adults.” This website includes tips such as praise them as they get along, teach them how to negotiate with others, have empathy for one another, and be a good example. BBC Health also talks about how birth plays a role in sibling relationships. The last topic they talk about in sibling relationships is helping with the age gap. BBC talks about how families should find activities that they can all participate on just at different levels and playing different roles in the activities (BBC - Health: Sibling Relationships). Overall, this website is a great resource for pointers and tips on how to have your children and help your children establish successful sibling relationships.
Handling Sibling Rivalry
http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/parenting/sibling_rivalry.shtml
The Child Development Institute Parenting Today gives some really great advice and information about sibling relationships. This website talks about how sibling relationships are determined by the child’s position in the family, the sex of the child, and the age of the children. It also states that the parent’ s attitude determines how the children behave to one another. It is mentioned on this website that it is not possible to treat the children as equals all the time. The parenting advice they give is: don’t compare your children to one another, don’t dismiss your child’s resentment or angry feelings, avoid situations that promote guilt in siblings, and they say try to let children settle their own conflicts with one another. The Child Development Institute Parenting Today has a special section on siblings with handicaps and it heeds parents to spend quality time with the children who are not special needs so they feel just as important as the child who might require more time and care. This website leaves you with the advice to not take sides and do not ignore the good behaviors the children have one to another (Handling Sibling Rivalry « Child Development Institute Parenting Today).
Photo above from http://stepfamiliestoday.wordpress.com
Most children in the world grow up with siblings, for some these will be your best friends, for others it might be the person you fight with the most, but one thing is certain your siblings will always be there for you. This topic was chosen because it has always been of interest to people in the world, why siblings act the way they do with one another. Why do they fight? Why are they the best of friends? When siblings are getting along the family flourishes, when siblings are suffering from contention the family is suffering with them.
The articles that were chosen summarize how sibling relationships work. The first article, “Siblings Relationships Reflect Family Dynamics”, talks about how girls feel closer to their siblings and boys feel this bond later on in life. The other information this article gives is interesting and informative regarding sibling relationships (Sibling Relationships Reflect Family Dynamics). The other article used entitled, “Early Sibling Relationships Influence Adult Behavior” talks about how siblings are better teachers at informal behaviors. It recognizes the fact that children are learning from their older siblings weather it be bad or good (Early Sibling Relationships Influence Adult Behavior - Psych Central News). Overall, the information in both articles is beneficial to know regarding sibling relationships.
The pictures were chosen because they best depicted sibling relationships. Siblings when they quarrel drive their mother’s crazy that is why the one is chosen with the mom with her hands on her head. The next one with the two boys interacting shows love in sibling relationships. Most often then not, this is how siblings are and how they interact with one another. The final one is of the two girls having a disagreement. No matter how much love is in a family, you are bound to have fights and disagreements, it is a normal part of having siblings.
The websites were chosen because they both gave great information on how to handle sibling relationships and rivalries. They talked about the effects each had on children and gave pointers to parents on how to help the arising problems between siblings. Each website was easy to read and follow the points they were discussing.
The articles that were chosen summarize how sibling relationships work. The first article, “Siblings Relationships Reflect Family Dynamics”, talks about how girls feel closer to their siblings and boys feel this bond later on in life. The other information this article gives is interesting and informative regarding sibling relationships (Sibling Relationships Reflect Family Dynamics). The other article used entitled, “Early Sibling Relationships Influence Adult Behavior” talks about how siblings are better teachers at informal behaviors. It recognizes the fact that children are learning from their older siblings weather it be bad or good (Early Sibling Relationships Influence Adult Behavior - Psych Central News). Overall, the information in both articles is beneficial to know regarding sibling relationships.
The pictures were chosen because they best depicted sibling relationships. Siblings when they quarrel drive their mother’s crazy that is why the one is chosen with the mom with her hands on her head. The next one with the two boys interacting shows love in sibling relationships. Most often then not, this is how siblings are and how they interact with one another. The final one is of the two girls having a disagreement. No matter how much love is in a family, you are bound to have fights and disagreements, it is a normal part of having siblings.
The websites were chosen because they both gave great information on how to handle sibling relationships and rivalries. They talked about the effects each had on children and gave pointers to parents on how to help the arising problems between siblings. Each website was easy to read and follow the points they were discussing.
Emerging Issues...
The impact siblings have on one another is huge. All younger siblings watch the example of the older brothers and sisters; this is a future issue that could cause younger children in the families to do things that are not appropriate. They want to be like them and talk like them and act like them. This can be a good or bad thing dependent on the older siblings.
Children these days are learning inappropriate language, learning things of sexual nature, and learning about drugs and alcohol at a much younger age. This has everything to do with sibling relationships. When a 5-year old child is seeing his 13-year old brother say “really cool words” he is going to start to say them as well. When this same brother sees him sneaking alcohol into the home to drink the younger brother is going to want to try it as well. Time and time again stories are heard where younger brothers or sisters began drinking, smoking, chewing tobacco, or even having sex because they saw an older sibling doing it, or an older sibling showed them how. This is not to say that all sibling relationships are an issue, there are many who lead by great example and turn out just fine, but the issue that is arising and that we need to focus on is making sure in these sibling relationships good things are being taught rather than the things that older siblings thing are cool to teacher their younger brothers or sisters.
Children these days are learning inappropriate language, learning things of sexual nature, and learning about drugs and alcohol at a much younger age. This has everything to do with sibling relationships. When a 5-year old child is seeing his 13-year old brother say “really cool words” he is going to start to say them as well. When this same brother sees him sneaking alcohol into the home to drink the younger brother is going to want to try it as well. Time and time again stories are heard where younger brothers or sisters began drinking, smoking, chewing tobacco, or even having sex because they saw an older sibling doing it, or an older sibling showed them how. This is not to say that all sibling relationships are an issue, there are many who lead by great example and turn out just fine, but the issue that is arising and that we need to focus on is making sure in these sibling relationships good things are being taught rather than the things that older siblings thing are cool to teacher their younger brothers or sisters.